Rhapsody on the Name Saxby Chambliss
by Adam Katz, CC '08
Ancient though it be and distant the hour
In which a man, by name Saxby Chambliss
Didst of the cup of victory's chablis
Drink; yet we must to it, so high does it tower.
And as we recall, do our deep brows lower
Bearing witness to the noxious shambles
Of the scruples of him we hope to be jobless,
Public opinion of this man to sour.
Lax be the moral compass of that state
Where the triple-amputee soldier
Could be marketed as degenerate
By him who risked naught worse than a debate
Facts be my witness: ere the state gets moldier,
It and Florida we should detonate.
Additionally by Mr. Katz:
Ode on a Grecian Urn by John Keats: or, Review on an English Ode on a Grecian Urn:
Quaint, at times, and better than Merton's parody.
Finnegans Wake by James Joyce:
Wait, come again?
The Faerie Queene by Edmund Spenser:
This vast book of learned but twisted verse
Germane to a knight who pricks o'er a plain
And other figures equally perverse
Doth seem to travel much the longer lane
Than wouldst the common reader, would he fain.
And yet, ywys his pen be sharp eno'
And quickly runs his overactive brain,
And tho' it amuse to watch his tales grow
Yet his work and glossary be too great and slow.
And lastly, The Jungle by Upton Sinclair:
Dude: Total sausage-fest.
Other Dishonorable Mentions