"Noh," said the Sex Friend, playfully.

Here follows the opening LitEx of Spring 2011 (Anno Philolectico 209, Meeting whateveritwas), courtesy of the brilliant Ms. Casiello, the society's most recent Broad Abroad. Hold onto your hats, folks: the first bit's a translation of a Noh play; the second's a translation of some "Yes" play (well, we and TBTN can only hope).

From the Noh play Kiyotsune, by Zeami: Ending section.

When I fell into the realm of hell

Yes, when I fell into the realm of hell

The trees standing around me transformed into enemies

The rain became their falling arrows

The ground their piercing swords

The mountains were their iron castle

Bearing the clouds as their standards

The soldiers readied their swords of arrogance

Their eyes gleamed with malice

With the lust, the envy, the wrath, the foolishness

That are the sins of all beings

Illusions and truth battled fiercely

One, striking like the waves

the other, pulling like the tide

They revealed to me the karma

Of my battles in the Western Seas

But that was only until now!

For at the last moment of my life,

I cried out to the Buddha for salvation

Now, I stand in the ship of the true law.

Since he asked for salvation, since he never doubted,

Kiyotsune, through his pure heart

Kiyotsune, through his pure heart

Has reached Buddhahood

Truly what a miracle this is!

From Sex Friend by Hishizawa Kugetsu

Background: Fujinori is a loser college student who lives in a tiny apartment. Takasu is a super hot guy who decides to move in with him because of some really transparent plot device reason.

"I thought your place seemed too neat, but really you just don't have anything here," Takasu said. "First time I've seen a room that didn't have a single CD."

"I don't listen to music that much."

"But it also looks like you don't watch TV or read magazines. Is that your only connection to the outside world?" Takasu was pointing at the laptop on top of the bookshelf pushed tight against the bed. What's this guy trying to say, thought Fuminari.

"You don't have any hobbies?"

"I guess not," Fuminori said shortly, having already been asked.

"What do you do for fun? Are you always at your girlfriend's house or something?"

"No girlfriend. I go on walks." He couldn't come up with a single thing he did besides go to school, work, or his apartment. He did kind of like walking with no place to go.

"Walk, and then? What?"

"Nothing really."

"Isn't that weird?"

"It feels nice to work the muscles, right?"

Takasu shrugged. Why was this guy smiling so wryly at him?

"Well, you don't need to keep standing. Sit down over here." He patted the space beside him. Fuminori ignored it and instead sat closer to the edge of the bed.

He stretched his legs out and began massaging his tense calves, his mind drifting off, thinking about what he was going to do for dinner—when suddenly, he felt something touch the small of his back.

"What are you doing?"

When he turned around, he heard a voice from lower down say, "Hmm?" Takasu was lying on his belly with his chin propped on his hand, the other hand stretched out towards Fuminori's back.

"I wondered what sort of body a person who walks a lot has."

"Huh?"

"You're not that thin. I thought you might be kind of scrawny." As he spoke, he grabbed his hip bone and Fuminori's shoulders jolted slightly.

"That tickles."

"Sorry." Takasu sat up quickly. He wrapped his arms around Fuminori from behind and pulled his shoulders close.

"Takasu?"

Fuminori could feel his hard chest against his back. Takasu's hands crossed in front of his chest and he was enclosed within Takasu's wide shoulders and long legs, so of course, he started to get suspicious.

"Hold still for a minute."

Before he had a chance to protest, Takasu's fingers undid the button on Fuminori's jeans and traced the seam of his underwear.

"What are you really after?" Fuminori asked, Just as he was about to tell him he couldn't leave his hands in such a risky position, as though about to slip inside, Takasu asked curiously, lips against Fuminori's ear, "Hmm? Is it so surprising?"

"Yeah, I'm asking because I'm surprised."

Twisting his body around so he could look over his shoulder into Takasu's eyes, he saw a face innocent of all evil intent.

"No, I just figured—I'll have to return your present, so instead, I'll give you my body as thanks."

Couldn't he have just helped me move that vase, Fuminori thought, and sighed. Of course not.

Those gentle eyes so close to his moved from Fuminori's for only a moment. His long eyelashes lowered slightly, his line of sight dropping to Fuminori's lips.

He wasn't so immature that he didn't understand the atmosphere of the moment. What Takasu was planning, he didn't know, but this had all the marks of a kiss.

...

[whereupon Ms. Casiello left some of us in the proverbial lurch—and others, who couldn't restrain themselves, reaching for a postprandial cigarette.]